My name is Jon Ebner

I am 26 years old

I am Imperfectly Perfect.

My father, Ron Ebner, passed away November 9, 2010. He had developed a chronic kidney disease in his early twenties and would go on to fight to stay alive up until the day he died at 56. By the time I was born my dad had already been struggling with his kidney disease for several years.

It felt like my Dad was in the military his whole life. Each time he had to go back to the hospital for a kidney transplant he went to war. FIVE times in his life he would do this and his final battle would be with cancer. My family didn’t have to move from state to state physically like a military family. We had to move state to state mentally and emotionally like a family whose patriarch had a chronic illness.

When I was young I did not realize daddy was going to war. In my mind he just had to go on a trip and he would be back soon. I got to play at grandmas. I was so naive and childlike. He was at war while I was playing in the grass with a smile on my face. He always came back with a positive attitude, at least that is what he showed me.

There would be peace in our lives for some time always waiting for another battle. Five times he would have major battles with small fights in between. My father left me for the first time when I was only a few weeks old to go to the hospital. Then again when I was around 7, then again at around 10, once more at around 16, and one final time at 20. I would go on to witness his final battle up close and personal at 25, this time I would be at war with him.

Day after day my father and I would sit in the hospital together. Aside from cherishing each day, he needed to teach me to run his business which supported our family my whole life. Those final months and year to follow his death were the hardest experiences of my life.

He was the most important person in the world to me. He taught me how to be an amazing father, a loving husband, a knowledgeable businessman, a caring friend, and most importantly a person who sees others for who they truly are. I suffered a tremendous physical, mental, emotional, and spiritual loss when he left this physical plane. However;

What I would go on to learn in the year to come

would not have been possible without this traumatic experience.

If IP were around after my dad passed I think things would have been easier. I struggled to find support through bereavement groups and therapy. Most of my friends could not understand the pain I was going through and my family was too wounded to provide help. I needed to be around people who had a shared experience. IP could have provided the access to the support I needed.

I chose to donate my story to IP in hopes other people who are struggling after the death of a close family member could find comfort in knowing they are not alone. The journey through grief has been the hardest challenge in my life. I feel that no matter what the struggle is in life, it is always easier to go through it with others.